If police dogs, why not police cats?

By Whisky, the Black & White Cat

Durham police responded favourably to this suggestion from a five-year-old well-wisher, and are apparently looking into the possibility of recruiting what may be the country’s first ever police cat.

Cat crime fighters could collar County Durham criminals

In the fond hope that Yorkshire Constabulary might be equally farsighted, I’m working on Ian to persuade him to volunteer as a civilian cat handler.

  + + +

And Neighbourhood Watch has taken on a whole new meaning ever since I myself, accompanied by a few friends armed with cat-cams, have taken to prowling the neighbourhood at night on the lookout for intruders and other malefactors operating under the imagined cover of darkness. They’ll need cats’ eyes themselves if they’re hoping to outwit us. And as for cat burglars: from now on they will go in fear and trembling.

Actually I’ve always fancied myself as a parking warden. It’s the work of a moment to jump up on the bonnet and check whether a valid ticket is being displayed behind the windscreen. And just let any dog try fouling the public right-of-way when I’m on patrol. Zero tolerance – there will be no cautions.

updated: 03:18 01/04/2016